Drugs
by xXxchiixXx
Summary: Two shot. SoraXRiku Lemon. Sora copes with Riku's drug use. Dark. [no longer a oneshot]
1. Drugs

**Wow... aint I on a roll?**

**Another oneshot from your truly.**

**Enjoy. And please review.**

**Drugs.**

I am sat now, my back against the hard oak of a dining room chair. I splay my hands across the table, reaching out as far as I can, and then pulling them back towards myself.

I am playing for time. I know that. So, whilst I am here, I shall think of happy thoughts. Or dreams that are joyful. Like, this table for instance. This table. Our table.

I say our table, because saying 'our' means it doesn't just belong to me. Which it doesn't. This table had another owner. My partner. My lover. Riku. We had decided to buy this table together.

I had seen the way his eyes lit up when their beautiful aqua gaze fell upon this rich, brown surface. He had found the perfect table to go in our dining room. And if Riku loved it, I had to buy it. We had bought the table and brought it home that very night.

I laugh as my mind goes back to what this table has been used for. We ate at it, we played cards over it, and once or twice it had been used as support in fiery nights where we became one, when we made love, my bare skin rubbing against it, my hands gripping the sides tightly, until the colour ran out from between my knuckles and my fingers burned.

The smiles leaves my lips. Yes, this table had been used for support. To support Riku when he staggers home, an obscene smile plastered on his face and white granules licking the base of his nose.

It was the drugs that made Riku rough. Don't get me wrong, he doesn't hit me or anything, but when he comes home, you will see what I mean. It's not bad enough for me to leave him now, but it's uncomfortable in the least.

I haven't seen Riku normal for a long time now. He's either high, or spiraling down in the aftermath of the drugs. When this happens, I hold him close whilst he cries and whines, and coo softly in his ear.

"Shhh baby… it will be alright. Calm down baby…"

My words are like poison. Like in Shakespeare, they will seep into his ears and lull him to sleep.

But it isn't permanent. Even I know that. The next day, he will be 'himself' again. He will be happy, he will be horny, he will be mad. He will grin and laugh, hold my hands or push me down onto my knees whenever he feels like it. Whenever the drugs tell him to. I just go with it. It hurts more if you struggle. It hurts so much more. But I still love it.

He's like a dark angel, my Riku. you see times when he is as happy as a child receiving candy. And then, sudden as the wind changes, he is fierce and hungry with lust. Lust for me.

I blush at that. Me and Riku have got so far together. We are so in love.

And then it hits me. Hard.

What if I'm wrong? What if Riku isn't in love with me? What if the drugs are? What is the drugs have gotten such a forced control over his mind that he's believing things he doesn't want to?

Chill Sora. Just chill. Riku loved you before he was on drugs… remember?

I force a smile and push the chair away from the table with a screech, standing up and making my way into the living room. I am so tired. But I can't sleep. I can't. What if he comes home? What if he comes home and I need to look after him? What is? What if?

So many possibilities. My eyes start to close as I drift into and endless abyss.

O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

I am dreaming. The haze across the room tells me that.

Riku is stood in front of me, stroking my face and talking to himself. His talking grows louder, so it is not longer a whisper, but a pounding voice in the back of my mind.

_A little piece of my heart, washed away by the tide,_

_We all hide what we hate; we all hate what we hide,_

He is singing. His voice sounds broken, like a cracked accordion.

_I want to fly away to a far away land, _

_Where our hearts are the sea and our souls are the sand,_

I close my eyes, and Riku's breath is on my lips, the moist skin brushing against my own.

_And the blood on your hands will soon fade away,_

_By the tide of tears that gave you away,_

My throat goes dry.

_And I know you are crazy, I know you're insane,_

_But I will hold you and teach you and take all of your pain,_

_And keep it myself in a tiny pink box,_

_Until that fateful day,_

_When opportunity knocks…_

I hear a noise at the door.

O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

My eyes flicker, surrendering to the light I forgot to turn off. I cast my sapphire gaze to the clock. One hand points slightly more to the right than the larger one, which points straight up. I sigh. 3 o'clock. He will be home soon. It's late enough. He will either come home and sleep, allowing me one night of mercy, or he will come home and fuck me. It's all the same.

We don't make love anymore. We don't even fuck each other. He fucks me. It has been a while since he teased me, drawing me up to my climax, but waiting for the perfect time, making sure I respond to every one of his touches, to every kiss. He used to touch me in ways that made me feel like I was the most beautiful person to walk the planet. His hands used to be experienced, used to brush across my skin with dignity.

Yet now his touch is clumsy, and his intentions are selfish. It is no longer about both of us, but him, and him alone.

I hear the door open in the distance. There are voices. Two of them. He has brought a friend home. This is rare.

Just to my relief, he leaves his friend outside, waving him off. I freeze in the living room, my hands welded to my sides. What will happen tonight?

"Sooooooooora…" He calls me in a kitten like voice. I knew it. I know what is going to happen now. His voice, he deliberately lowered it into a more seductive tone.

I see him swagger into the living room and reality hits. He is dangerously beautiful, like a spider that is fatally venomous, but you can't resist to touch. He motions me to get him a coffee. God knows, he doesn't need it with all that coke in his system.

I am afraid to turn away, but I walk into the kitchen anyway. I take up his mug and shake granules into it. The brown kind. The safe kind. I add a little spoonful of sugar to sweeten the taste. I flick the switch of the kettle and sit down at the dining table. Across from Riku.

We sit in silence. I admire him. he admires me. We gaze at each other across the table, not saying a word.

Time seems to collapse in on itself. I hear the clock in the living room ticking loudly, clearly, ringing out into the silent void that rested upon the kitchen.

I was relieved when the kettle pinged. I shot up like a bolt and went to pick the kettle up, when I stop, noticing a hand on my own.

Riku. He stand behind me, trapping me between the countertop and himself. I wriggle around in the small space I have and look at him questioningly.

Please. Don't so this. Not tonight. I have waited for you to come home so I can help you. This won't help, this won't help…

My thoughts pass unnoticed. His pupils are huge. A pink tongue darts out quickly, removing a few stray granules from his lips. The lips that are so close to mine, my lips are hot and sticky from his breath.

"Sora I think caffeine would be bad for me. Do you think I would be able to sleep?"

I swallow the lump in my throat, forcing it down my gullet. "B-But Riku… you asked for a coffee…"

"I didn't…" He smirks and pushed himself against me, so I have my back arched against the countertop, my spine grinding against the cold marble. I have nowhere to put my hands at all, so they hang limp at my sides.

He leans down and I turn my head to the side. I close my eyes tight, gasping a little when something warm and moist traces my earlobe. He whispers. I freeze.

"P…P-Punish me?"

He grabs my shoulders in a vice like grip and forces me towards him, shoving his mouth so hard onto mine, it hurts. Salty blood trickles down my chin as his teeth nip my lips, and a pain explodes in my mouth. I can feel tears forming in the corners of my eyes, the ones I squeeze shut, to escape from reailty. I taste blood and a tinge of drugs on my tongue. I lower my arms, pushing him away, just enough to make this kiss enjoyable.

He doesn't let me. His steely fingers grip my wrists tightly, refusing to let go. I attempt to slide to the side, away from him. I am desperately trying to soften this mad embrace, to try and stop him from tearing my mouth to shreds. He doesn't let me. His kiss becomes more vicious, almost possessive. I am frightened. This Riku scared me. I didn't like being ravaged like a broken doll.

A cry escapes my lips as his hands roughly grab my waist and sits me upright on the countertop. My legs dangled by his sides, and he looks at me, a crude look washing over his face.

A moment passes. Then another. I blink, noticing how closely he is observing my face.

I doesn't last long. He is soon at my mouth again, biting my tongue. I wrap my legs around his waist, because otherwise, I am going to fall off. His hands find my thighs, my back, my ass. He lifts me up as if I am made of paper and sits me down on the table.

I hear the mug hit the floor. Smash.

When I'm busy worrying about the mug, somehow, he has taken off my pants. They are wrapped tightly around my ankles. He had what he needed. He didn't need anything else.

He turns me round. I was crying now, harder than before, but he still doesn't notice. He was just going to ram himself inside him when I still wasn't ready. I hear a familiar zipping nose from behind me and I try to move away. I feel his cold hands on my hips I bite my sore bottom lip, flinching from the pain it gives me. It's no use.

Riku breathes out, fast, then, he cruelly forces himself inside me. I scream. He doesn't give me a moment to catch myself, oh no. He pulls out and slams right back into me again. I cry out, reaching across the table to grasp something, anything.

There is nothing. I stretch out as far as I can and grip the edges of the table, hard, so they start making red welts in my palms. Riku throws his head back, closing his eyes and thrusting fatser, making a grunting sound with every push. I feel a gloopy substance trickle down the back of my thighs. It's blood. God, it hurts so much. I don't stop screaming. And when I do, I let out a choked, "R-Riku" or a "S-Stop".

He doesn't listen. He's digging his fingernails into my shoulder now, raking them through my skin. How would I explain that to my friends at collage? Would they know of another drug filled, lustful night with Riku? would they guess?

My body bucks, against my will. I can feel the sweat sticking my hair to my face. I close my eyes tightly. Riku was so stubborn. Until he had his release, I was a slave to him. A slave to submit to his wants and needs, no matter how much it hurt. I throw my head forward, my thighs grinding into the table. Riku has so much pent up frustration, from the drugs; I won't be able to walk tomorrow.

Yet, relief washes through me. Riku is going to rehab tomorrow. He promised me. I cry out again, this time more in pleasure than in pain and he tangles a hand in my hair, dragging it back and leaning forwards, so his lips graze my neck, leaving marks to couple those trails on my shoulders.

He goes faster, thrusting desperately trying to meet his climax. I know I am close too. Fresh blood fills my mouth as I accidentally bite my tongue. It is nearly over. Waves of pleasure flood through me as Riku rides out the last of his orgasm, his seed filling me and drenching my thighs and ass with overflow. There is a mess on the table seconds later.

He pulls out of me with a grunt and zips his pants back up. My legs give out and I collapse on the floor, not bothering to pull my pants back up. I hurt so much.

Riku seems different. It is then that I notice his eyes are back to normal, and he is looking at me with regret in his aqua eyes.

"I've got to stop doing this…" he mumbles guiltily. I don't answer. Does he mean me or the drugs?

His arms wrap around me and he lifts me up, which is good, because I can't walk at all. There is a dull pain in my rear and searing pains throughout the rest of my body.

I feel cold sheets flutter down over my body and Riku lays an icy hand on my sweaty forehead before kissing it gently.

"I'm going to rehab tomorrow. Will you come with me?"

I nod. No more strength left to talk. His arms have found their way around me and I shuffle into a more comfortable position, turning in the sheets so my head is buried in his shoulder. I lean into his touch. So tired.

My eyes shoot open as I feel a stroking round my ass. I clutch his shoulder, and he smiles, removing his hand, and a blood stained tissue. I manage a weak smile before snuggling up to him again. There are times when he is sweet, but there are also times when he is dangerous. Dark angel, remember? I know that, but yet, it's hard to differentiate between them.

Yes. Tomorrow is going to be a good day. I just know it is. Even though it will be hard for him, I'll be there to help him. to support him. I'll help him with his demons.

And for once, I shall be happy to admit my relationship with him I don't have to be ashamed anymore.

And when Riku gets over his treatment, he will be happy too. He will be happy being back to normal.

He will turn back.

Turn back to the Riku I fell in love with.

**Ouch. Soppy.**

**Please review!**

**XD**


	2. Rehab

**'Rehab'**

**Sequel To 'Drugs'**

**xXxchiixXx**

**Sora**

I awake to the faint streaming of sunlight from the bedroom window and a noise; like water smashing against tiles. I rise with some difficulty. A dull pain is present throughout my body, and purple bruises can be seen on my thighs. With a slight shake of my head, I spin my body so my feet hit the floor, and I grab one of Riku's discarded shirts, tugging it over my head and yanking it down over my nakedness.

Judging by the steam that is seeping from under the bathroom door, he is having a shower. I let out a small sigh and pad downstairs, pushing open the door and taking some cereal from the cuboard. I pour some into a little white bowl with a crack in it. I grab the milk from the fridge and trickle it over the cereal. Riku comes downstairs wearing some clean boxers. I look up at him from where I am sitting and watch him search through the cupboards.

"What are you looking for Riku?" I ask politely after swallowing a mouthful of Wheatabix. He doesn't turn to look at me, instead focusing on what he is looking for.

"My favourite mug... the black one with the stars on it... you know the one."

I force the lump that is currently residing in my throat, down to my stomach, but it doesn't get there. It gets stuck halfway.

"Riku... you broke it... don't you remember?"

He freezes. "Oh yeah. Of course I do."

He stops searching, instead grabbing a small purple mug and shaking some coffee granules into it. He flicks the switch for the kettle and sits across the table. His hair is ruffled and hangs limp by his face. His eyes are slightly bloodshot, and there are bags under his eyes. This has become Riku's recent look.

"What time are we setting off?" I ask quietly.

He groans and rests his head in one of his hands, supported by his elbow on the table. "Set off where?"

I look at him for a minute. How the hell could he not remember?

"You really don't remember, do you?"

I shake my head and stand up, turning for the door, but he's there in an instant.

"Remember what Sora?"

He is so close to me. One wrong move and he'll go into one of his temper tantrums. I turn on the cute smile and raise a hand to his cheek.

"We're going to rehab today… remember?"

He catches my wrist as I bring my hand down. I stare into those aqua pits and manage to keep my composition. Riku knows full well that I lose myself in his eyes all too easily.

He kneels down, keeping a firm grip on my wrist. I look down at him, and he gives me a weary smile.

"Will it make you happy?"

I nod slowly, wondering what game he is playing this time.

"Then I'll go. Okay?"

I lean down and kiss him softly and gratefully on the lips. I can feel him smile as I do so. His arms gently wrap around me and for the first time in a long time, his warmth is comforting.

O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

The room is full of pot heads and cocaine addicts. I can smell the marijuana on their ragged clothes and still their wives cling to them. I feel fingertips tickling my palm, and then a hand slides inside mine. With a single glance upwards, I can see that Riku is afraid to be here. He will have to face all of who he is in this room.

"Don't worry Ri-chan," I whisper. I know that by calling him Ri-chan, my old pet name for him, he will be reassured. It works.

I sit on a chair next to Riku and a concerned looking woman with a faux snakeskin bag to match her boots. She is biting her nails and throwing glances at her husband… or her boyfriend… whatever he was, and then at the counsellor.

"So! Can someone tell me why we are here?" She is a bubbly, lively young woman, with a man sat at her side.

A teenager, complete with acne and a cigarette in his hand mutters, "To help us with our addictions."

"Great! But before we get into that, this session is one where we can all introduce ourselves! My name is Yuffie! And this is my partner, Vincent!"

She points at the raven haired man behind her, and then at the first man in the circle.

Introductions there were. I learn that the lady with the baby three seats down was beaten by her husband and gang raped by his friends in the back of his truck, and the baby she holds is not his. I also learn that the man directly facing me was forced into prostitution to get more money to fuel his drug addiction.

But now it's Riku's turn.

He stands up, just like they all have done, both hands behind his back, and I can see he is fidgeting with his fingers.

"Um… I'm Riku… and the reason I'm here is to help my addiction so I don't hurt my partner anymore."

"Who is your partner? Yuffie asks with a grin.

"This is my partner, Sora. We have been through a lot, and this… well… _problem_ I have is driving us apart."

"I see. How do you hurt Sora when you are on a high?"

He freezes up again. "Well… you see… I don't remember much…"

"Get on with it!" The lady with the baby shouts out. "I told you all of my past! This is your chance to be honest!"

He bites his lip and looks to the floor. "Well… you see… I only really remember flashes… but… I get really rough with him… like… when we have sex and stuff…. And when he tells me to stop… I can't… and… I'm just treating him like a slave… and he deserves better than that. At the minute, I don't deserve to be in the presence of him. Why he stays with me… I'll never know."

I stay silent, revelling in shock. I never realised just how Riku felt about what he did. I never knew that his true feelings were undeserving of me.

There was a silent breeze whispering gently around the room. An air of sadness is creeping its way into my aura. I give a small shudder and remove the floor from my line of vision.

"I guess… what I really want… is to give Sora what he really deserves. Someone that can care, and isn't stoned and high, that will smack him around."

Riku's face isn't shadowed. The light that glares down heavily from the uncovered light bulb hanging overhead was shining down brightly, making his face glow with a bright sheen. His eyes were full of something I hadn't seen in a long time. Sincerity. Appreciation. Love, I guess.

"I can see that your motivation drives you very well. With a motivation like a partner, giving up will be eas…ier."

Easier. Not easy enough.

O0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

We are driving home. Everything is silent, a silence I am too afraid to break for fear of what might be said. I gaze pointedly out of the passenger seat window, and Riku never takes his eyes off the road. A small tap knocks me out of whatever trance I am floating in and I glance up at the windscreen. A raindrop smashes down, shattering on the glass, quickly followed by another, and another…

"It's raining…" Riku mumbles, just loud enough for me to hear him. I look carefully at the droplets cast off by the raindrop and answer him with a, 'Hm'. I hear him chuckle slightly, and the car takes a swift left into our driveway.

The house is surprisingly clean for once. It's because I spent all of the day yesterday cleaning it. The only thing that's dirty is the table. I didn't have the strength to clean it yesterday, so it was left overnight and I have the overwhelming urge to launch over the table and scrub it so hard it will break. I give my head a quick shake, so excess droplets of water slide from my hair. I see Riku do the same from the corner of my eye. He hangs up his long black jacket in the hall and I let out a stifled yawn. We got up quite early today.

I put Riku's mug in the sink; the one from this morning. I feel a strong pair of arms slip around me and I melt into the embrace, leaning back slightly.

"Hey… want to watch a movie?"

We haven't watched movies in a long while. Our couch has only been used recently for Riku when he comes home high and I lock the bedroom door.

Yet now, he's pulling me along by the hand like an over enthusiastic child, yanking me down to the floor to run his fingers over the spines of various titles, occasionally tapping one, but thinking better of it. I am not interested in movies. When Riku didn't take drugs, we used to watch movies until the sun came up and we'd be just like children, holding hands, holding each other and snuggled up together, warm and comfortable.

"Spiderman? Hellboy? Spirited Away? Sora?"

"Sora? That's not a movie…"

"I was just checking to see if you were still with me."

I laugh, taking a film from the rack and placing it in his open palm. "Howl's Moving Castle? Please Riku? I love it."

"Awww… do we have to…?"

I put on the puppy dog eyes I know he can't resist. I even add in the quivering bottom lip for extra effect.

"Fine… damn that look…"

I smile broadly and follow him to the armchair and sit down whilst he places the disk in the DVD tray and sorts the Television to the right channel.

He walks back over and frowns. I automatically flinch. I feel his fingers coil like solid steel around my wrist, and he yanks me out of the chair. My foot stumbles, and I can feel myself falling to the floor when I am stopped by a pair of arms I know oh so well.

"Clumsy Sora…" He tuts at me, and I only then realise that he pulled me out so he could sit in the chair and I'd have to sit in his lap. I let out a tiny sigh of relief. In actual fact, relief is washing through me, pouring out of every orifice I had. Thank god. I thought Riku had gone psycho again. But no… it's all okay.

I clamber into his lap with a smile and lean into his chest when he pulls me close. I rest for a minute, taking in the faint sound of his heart beating lightly in his chest, slowly, because he was so relaxed. Well, still faster than it should have normally been going, but at least it calmed down somewhat.

His hands lock around my middle and one hand strays to my hip, just like it used to do, cupping it and playing with the bone that jutted out slightly. The tiny hairs on my tummy rise to his touch. He smoothes my skin down, moving his hand more to my back; when I involuntarily flinch. Riku looks away from the film to widen his eyes at me. He pulls back my sweater and sees a purple and yellow bruise. I knocked my hip against the table yesterday…

"How did you do that Sora?" True concern was rimming his voice. He honestly didn't remember.

"I… uh… fell…"

"Bullshit Sora. Bullshit."

"I did! Into the table! Yesterday!"

"How the hell did you manage that? What were you doing? Juggling mugs?"

"We were… _you know_…"

He freezes for the third time that day. I could practically see the cogs mashing together in his mind trying to remember what happened last night. I touch his cheek affectionately and smile. "It's okay… don't you worry about it."

"I meant what I said."

His eyes are dark, filled with something I don't really understand. I don't know what he means.

"About… wanting to be deserved by you."

I can only look at him. I feel like there are things I should say… but I can't… nothing escapes my mouth. It's like I'm thinking, but nothing is running through my mind. I think he notices my speechlessness and the fact that I can't form a thought.

"You don't have to say anything you know." He lets out a little laugh and I suddenly feel like I'm at home. The home it was before anything unholy touched the inside of these four walls. I look back at the screen to see Howl holding Sophie's hands and guiding them both through the air. Walking in the air... how strange.

"You're not scared of me are you?"

"_You truly are a natural"_

His face is suddenly deadly serious. Like all the smiles that had graced his face a moment ago had flown out of the window and been smashed into by a ten ton train. I don't really know how to answer this one. Strange questions like this catch me off guard. I shake my head, noticing how shaking my head didn't seem to drain the seriousness from his features.

"No... Of course not. I love you... remember?"

That makes him happy. Whenever I say that he seems to perk up and smile. He does it now, and I return it.

"_He rescued me Letty…"_

"I love you too Sora. More than anything."

'More than the drugs?'

And… as if he could read my thoughts, he plants a gentle kiss to my temple.

"More than the drugs."


End file.
